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March 19, 2012
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How to Live with Introverts (PDF available!) by RomanJones How to Live with Introverts (PDF available!) by RomanJones
PDF BOOK IS NOW AVAILABLE! romanjones.deviantart.com/jour…

I thought a lot of folks out there could benefit from learning how to with introverted people.
I drove my ex crazy by being introverted. He thought that I was being "distant" and "purposely ignoring him as part of a passive-aggressive power play". Here I was just enjoying his company without talking.

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Chinese translation: www.guokr.com/post/411816/

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Daily Deviation

Given 2012-06-09
:icongetthegrooveon:
Getthegrooveon Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Sounds like the truth to me XD
Reply
:iconlamlarts:
LamLArts Featured By Owner 6 days ago
Isn't it ; D
I remember you talked about these kind of things not to long ago. 
Reply
:icona-bob:
A-bob Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It must be. I can understand why they do that(because they're issues aren't taken seriously) but it doesn't make it any less annoying when they have to emphasize their problems like their life is harder than anyone else's. I don't want to be rude to my friend, but I'm kind of looking forward to when our friendship dies. I'm not going to suddenly end our friendship, but I'm not really going to try to maintain it. Mostly because I've lost sympathy for him. He's always negative about everything, it's hard to be sympathetic to someone like that. So, yeah, I understand completely.

I simultaneously feel sorry for her and feel happy she got was she deserved. XD 

Must be. 
I can be sometimes. Texting arguments I usually do fairly well, but I'm a weak speaker. I'd never be able to have a face-to-face argument with someone I don't know. It's alright with people I do know, but that's more up in the air. I just hate being wrong. I know I should just drop things and accept when I'm wrong more often than I do. It's a flaw of mine I should work on. On the bright side, I bounce back from arguments well. I don't hold grudges.
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:iconmegaloler:
MegaLoler Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't know if I'm introverted or extroverted.. maybe a bit of both? o-o

I LOVE being around people, and I get sad for a while when I have to leave a group of people.  Sounds extroverted?
Well I'm usually not outgoing around these people at all.. in fact I'm one of the shyest people I have ever seen in my whole life.  I NEVER talk unless spoken to. (but I love talking when I am spoken too!)  Sounds introverted?
Another thing... despite being rediculously quiet and reserved, I have intense desires to befriend everybody I spend even a little bit of time with and I want to be really energetic and outgoing (but I don't because I'm too shy)  Sounds extroverted?
However... I much prefer the idea of being really good friends with a small number of people rather than being okay friends with a huge number of people... Sounds introverted?

Extroverted, introverted, extroverted, introverted... o_o

The only time I don't actually want to be around people is when I'm super busy with a project that's sucking away all of my attention span, in which case it's just because I'm busy.  That or the people are mean... but I seriously like almost anybody!
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:icontealinia93:
Tealinia93 Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I wonder if that's a common thing amongst people with social issues like that; acting like they're the only ones allowed to have problems because they're "worse" or whatever. Kinda makes you lose sympathy for those people. No wonder social issues aren't really taken seriously, though. My ex friend would always roll her eyes at my issues and try to say hers were worse, or mine weren't the same, and all that. I eventually just stopped feeling sorry for her because I felt that she simply didn't deserve it. She certainly wasn't appreciating it, at any rate.
But the awesome thing is that karma continues to bite her in the butt for being a traitor and being so selfish. :)

Must be those repelling poles, lol.
You're pretty good at arguing. xD
Reply
:icona-bob:
A-bob Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Most likely. I just have a hard time letting other people have the last word. It would always drive my mom nuts when my sister and I got into an argument.

That makes sense. I wish people would have understood you more, it probably would have helped a lot. I have a friend who likes to complain about his life and it's hard to sympathize with him when he turns things toward his bad situation whenever I complain about something in my life. I had to learn not to trust him with my feelings. With him, it feels like I'm not allowed to have social anxiety problems because his social anxiety is worse or something like that. So I can understand that it's frustrating when your ex friend acted like she was the only one allowed to be shy.

True enough. It think it's a good thing, despite it being part of what caused our argument. 
Reply
:iconromanjones:
RomanJones Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
You're welcome! And thank you!!
Reply
:icontealinia93:
Tealinia93 Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh, believe me, I'm ridiculously stubborn too. That's probably why this went on as long as it did.

But yeah, the understanding thing isn't really an issue for me. The sympathy part is, though. It's hard for me to pass sympathy out, since I never got any with my own situation. But I guess that's because my whole family is more extroverted while I'm more introverted, and my ex friend thought she was the only one allowed to be shy in crowds or whatever. Blah...

It sounds like you and I aren't so different. We obviously both have strong feelings about..well, our feelings, lol.
Reply
:icona-bob:
A-bob Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I still don't like that, but I'm going to let it drop. I need to learn to be less stubborn sometimes.

Yeah, I can understand that. People will just lash out in whatever ways they can, whether or not they realize how the message comes across. 
I don't mind listening, don't worry about it. Your problem with your friend sound basically like friends not quite understanding each other. I don't have that problem since my best friend and I are so similar. Taking both sides isn't bad, since you do have a bit of both worlds, but I guess it can put you in an interesting spot that's difficult to understand since people tend to group others into 'introvert' and 'extrovert,' and that can cause problems for people who don't necessarily fit into either category. Learning I was an introvert helped me because people kept telling me I had to have more fun and go to school dances, but those things weren't really what I wanted to do and nobody seemed to understand that. Maybe if you could find something that was geared more toward understanding those people with the 'both complex,' it would help you feel more understood like learning I was introvert did for me.

I can understand that now. This all makes more sense now that I know you aren't as much of an introvert as I initially thought you were. Understanding people is difficult, especially when they act different in different situations. Which was probably part of your problem. It happens to me sometimes too, I have slightly different personalities depending on who I am with. Earlier, you said something about there being no absolute introvert or extrovert, and that's completely true. People and personalities are so complicated because of that. If everything was as simple as pure extrovert or introvert, we probably wouldn't have been arguing in the first place. 

I'm really glad we're not arguing about this anymore. Most arguments I have end on a bad note because there's either a misunderstanding, or I'm too stubborn to let the other person get the last word. Most of the time though, I avoid conflict.
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:iconcrimson-leviathan:
Crimson-Leviathan Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
This is beautiful piece of work you have made and explains introverts (me) very accurately. Thank you for this!

Now for me to never show this to others..
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