My UBC contest entry

I have no idea but I was laughing like a dumbfuck the whole time.
I won't be winning since I'm a judge. I did this for fun.

Join the UBC contest here!
UGLY BOOK COVERS CHALLENGE!!!Vik and I want to announce a NEW CONTEST!!!
CREATE THE UGLIEST BOOK COVER!!!
Use all your creativity and knowledge of all things ugly!
SHOCK US WITH YOUR TASTELESSNESS!!!
--------------------------
Rules:
Make a travesty of graphic design for a book, movie, or video game.
The subject can be something that already exists, like doing a porn version of To Kill a Mockingbird, or something of your own invention, like a guide to Mexican soap operas or something.
BE CREATIVE!! Badness takes effort! You need to get into the mind of a madman and believe that your bullshit is awesome!!
Contest ends April 30th!
---------------------------
Need inspiration? Check out our collection here: http://uglybookcovers.deviantart.com/ as well as GISing the awful selection at Kindle books!
2nd Prize:
Get your ugly cover made into a comic!!
1st Prize:
Get your ugly cover made into a comic!!
Get your cover printed as a postcard and signed by Vik, me, and Gatsby the dog!!
HAVE FUN YOU DORKS!!!
-----------------