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Words by NotTheOnlyBoyForYou

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Submitted on
March 16


6 (who?)
I read an article here:…
giving advice to cispeople - don't ask these questions to transpeople and why.

I'm really surprised that cispeople find it okay to ask and say incredibly ugly, demeaning things to transpeople - questions they would NEVER ask another cisperson. They honestly don't see a problem with it and I think it's about a lack of education about the subject paired with a general feeling that since these questions wouldn't hurt THEM, why should they hurt US?

The problem with the article is that cispeople would never read this. This is what journalists call an "ugly baby story" - one where only people directly involved will care about it.

What we instead need is a series of good answers transpeople can use to respond to shitty questions that we will be (and have been) asked.

1. "You look so real, I never would have known!"
Thanks, you too!

2. "What do you do with your partner?"
What do you do with yours?
We morph into raccoons and dig around in garbage.

3. "I though you were going to be scary, but you're so polite and normal!"
I generally have a fear of straight cis people, since you're the ones who try to kill people like me.

4. "I don't care; you'll always be a girl/boy to me."
And you'll always be a high schooler.

5. "Aren't you afraid of getting beaten up?"
Why yes, I am in constant danger of violence. Thank you for reminding me.

6. "Meet my friend; he's/she's transgender, too!"
I have a cis friend I'd like you to meet.

7. "When did you realize you were gay/lesbian?"
Polite: Sexuality and gender identity are not the same thing.
Rude: When did you realize you were straight/cis?

8. "Any question about your genitals."
That's waaaaaaay too personal of a question
Do you always ask people about their genitals?
You tell me about your genitals first.
How old are you/how much do you weigh?

Got any other good responses? Put them in the comments!
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alex-weiss Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2014
I can't believe people would ask questions like that. >.<
RomanJones Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Yeah, they're pretty damn insensitive
floridapanther28 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
"How did you know?" 

"I always knew I was a boy. It took me a while to notice my vagina though, but when I did, it was like, 'holy shit, I actually have a vagina.'" 

"Okay... so, since you're transgender, you want a penis?" 
Polite: "Actually, wanting different sex organs is transsexual! Not all transgender people are transsexual." 
Sass: "I'm Mr. What Zit Tooya." 
RomanJones Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
pffff haha
alexmancerx Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2014
RomanJones Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
NotTheOnlyBoyForYou Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2014
lol these are the best!! people ask the dumbest shit sometimes...what's funny to me though is most people I talk with are too careful and freak out about being rude or anything- which is downright annoying. so there are both in the world Eyeroll Icon If people just imagined (god forbid, right) what it would feel like to hear those questions directed at them, life would be so much nicer.
RomanJones Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I think that's the problem - many people just can't imagine what it must feel like to be on another person's place.

It's like when a man makes a sexually demeaning comment to a woman. He has no idea what it's like to be told from childhood that he is the lesser of the species and that his body is the only thing of interest to the world. He has absolutely no idea and therefore can't relate, and THEREFORE doesn't recognize it as a problem. 
NotTheOnlyBoyForYou Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2014
HELL YES to that, my friend. Have you seen this video?…

even more annoying is the poor men and women who actually do understand this and are not ok with it (like us) getting abused by the men and women who think it's fine and "natural"...and the women who think it's not ok and absolutely freak about it and hate all men... 
LightAnimaux Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Asking someone what pronoun they want to be mentioned by isn't considered rude, right?
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